Having a prompting to write a new blog post, but having no idea what my topic should be, I decided just to go with the spirit, and see what comes out on the other end.
I don't know if anyone really reads my blog, but it has came in handy when people ask me about my conversion story. I am rounding the corner to my 4 month mark as a member of The church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, and it has been such a wonderful journey- so far. I am learning more than the basics of the religion, I am finally acclimated into the singles ward, and I feel like I have been apart of the culture forever. People are even starting to ask me "when are you going to get married?" or, "Did you go to BYU?"
I am use to the coffee smell in my office at work now, and its became second nature to make sure my favorite energy drinks do not have tea as one of the main ingredients. My curse words have been down to a very low minimum, and my music play list has been dwindled down to a whopping 50 songs that I can listen to that still allow the spirit to be with me.
This conversion of mine has not always been simple or easy. I have been faced with plenty of opposition, and harsh words. I am learning to brush it off, but lets be honest, I still get so frustrated and hurt by the way some people act towards me, now that I am a member of the church.
I recently logged onto facebook to see a notification that told me a friend had commented on my wall post. This wall post was back from March 2012, over a year ago. I posted "hey, how are you?" and they never responded. Back at this time I was still talking to this person on a semi regular basis, and it was always about God, and which religion I should be apart of. I had expected a reply but never got one. He not being a member of the church advised me not to join, sent me a living waters version of the new testament in the mail, and was doing what he could to help me find the answers I had been earnestly looking for. Anyway, just a few days ago, he decided to respond to that wall post and as kindly as I am sure he could have been, said, "hey look at (insert scripture and doctrine here). It says Jesus is the Only God and marriage doesn't exist in heaven, anything else is trash."
For a brief moment I was like... eh whatever. Then it occurred to me, Hey, he didn't even tell me how he was or try to see how I was, he even went out of his way to dig through a years worth of facebook to respond with this nonsense...
I was hurt and confused. Of course he doesn't agree with the church, this much I knew. But to have him go out of his way to say my beliefs are "trash" and to give me scripture to apparently back it up? UGH! I could very well respond with doctrine to back myself and my beliefs up, heck, I could even toss a Book of Mormon in the mail and challenge him to read it. I am not one for confrontation. If I can avoid it at all costs I will, but when it comes to something I am so sure about, it shakes me to my very core. I read the scripture he gave me, trying to wrap my head around it all, and I decided to just let it roll off my back and pretend it didn't happen.
It didn't work very well because it bugged me the whole day! I can see things from his point of view, or anyone else for that matter. I know what it feels like to be a member of the church and to want others to feel the way I do. I want people to know of the gospel and if someone is investigating or is curious I will jump at the opportunity to share what I know to be true. If I feel this strongly about my church, how can others not feel strongly about their church, right? I always make sure to NEVER tell someone they are wrong, or that what they believe doesn't matter or it isn't true. It doesn't get me anywhere, and it makes the church look snobby.
What is different about all my experiences with opposition so far though, is with every instance people have gone way out of their way to tell me I am wrong, and then try to prove me with doctrine from the bible. Not only have they told me I am wrong, but they have not ever asked me how I feel about the subjects, asked me about what the church believes on matters or asked me to explain how we get what we got. No one fully understands all the things I have gone through or how I came to be a member of the church. No one has ever asked me without the intent to throw doctrine in my face.
First I want the world to know the LDS church DOES believe the bible to be the word of God, we do read it, we do study it, and we do love it. The members of my church know the bible better than anyone I have ever known, they recall stories and scriptures without a second thought and are able to explain the connections between the bible and the book of Mormon without a problem. I know people who study theology, and will 'explain' the bible and what it means, but wont give the Book of Mormon a chance. I want to naturally discredit what people say about the church when they haven't picked up the Book of Mormon, read it and prayed about it. I mean, how can one 'know' if they haven't set out to sincerely pray about it? After all that is what I did and that is how I gained my testimony.
I still don't know everything about the church, I cant pull scripture out of no where to help myself when I am faced with things like this, but I have learned two things. One: I can argue until pigs fly about doctrine, but nothing over rules testimony. I just say 'this is what I know to be true, and nothing you say or do is going to change this.' Two: the lords people will ALWAYS be persecuted, judged and scoffed at. Look at Jesus' apostles. I mean, look at Joseph Smith who was driven out of his homes, tarred and feathered and put in jail. The Lord's people will always have the feeling of being small and insignificant like I often do when faced with opposition, but because I am a daughter of my Father in heaven, I have the biggest and most powerful support system backing me up, helping me stand up for what is right and true. Ministering Angels surround me and guide me daily, helping me over come the 3 month conversion hump.
I have gotten anti-Mormon hate mail with videos that take the truth and twist it just enough to confuse anyone who doesn't really know, I have had people I was friends with leave me in the dust because of my choice, I have even had to stand up to my own family, and explain myself. nothing has came to me that has scared me away from the church, changed my mind in anyway, or made me take a second guess. I walk by faith, knowing that Heavenly Father isn't misleading me. The spirit guided me to baptism, why would I have had such a strong feeling to enter into the waters of baptism if this wasn't real?
It is my testimony, to anyone who wants to open their hearts and listen, that the restored gospel of Jesus Christ is the gospel I live every day. I know that if you have a copy of the Book of Mormon you will start to feel the power that it has. If you read it, sincerely pray to God and ask him if it is true, He will tell you that is another testament of His Holy Son, Jesus Christ. I know that God wants all of us to be happy, and that He is giving us all a chance, every day, to repent, come unto Christ and earn eternal life. He doesn't care about the money you make, the car you drive or the job title you have. He doesn't care about what you have done, because He wants to forgive you. That is the power of the atonement. It washes us clean. It is about coming unto Christ fully, with a broken heart and contrite spirit. taking a step in the dark and trusting the light will follow. I stand as a witness that heavenly Father lives. This is my humble testimony in the name of my savior and my redeemer, Jesus Christ, Amen.
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